"A ''Bay Area Bisexual'' told me I didn't quite coincide with either of her desires."

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More quotes from: Woody Allen

• "A fast word about oral contraception. I asked a girl to go to bed with ..."
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• "Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night. "
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• "Eternal nothingness is fine if you happen to be dressed for it. "
• "He was so depressed, he tried to commit suicide by inhaling next to an Armenian. "
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• "I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose. "
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• "I don't believe in the after life, although I am bringing a change of underwear. "
• "I don't have to 'freedom-kiss' my wife when what I really want to do is ..."
• "I don't respond well to mellow, you know what I mean, I-I have a tendency ..."
• "I don't think my parents liked me. They put a live teddy bear in my ..."
• "I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through ..."
• "I failed to make the chess team because of my height. "
• "I had a terrible education. I attended a school for emotionally disturbed teachers. "
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• "I ran into Isosceles. He had a great idea for a new triangle! "
• "I tended to place my wife under a pedestal. "
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• "I took a speed-reading course and read War and Peace in twenty minutes. It involves ..."
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• "I was thrown out of N.Y.U. my freshman year... for cheating on my metaphysics final. ..."
• "I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick. Not wounded. Dead. "
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• "I'm not afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens. "
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• "I've never been an intellectual but I have this look. "
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• "If my films don't show a profit, I know I'm doing something right. "
• "If my films make one more person miserable, I'll feel I have done my job. "
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