Quotation:
"It was dramatic to watch my grandmother decapitate a turkey with an ax the day before Thanksgiving. Nowadays the expense of hiring grandmothers for the ax work would probably qualify all turkeys so honored with "gourmet" status."
More quotes from: Russell Baker
- "A group of politicians deciding to dump a President because his morals are bad is ..."
- "A new star with a tremendous national appeal, the skill of a consummate showman. "
- "A railroad station? That was sort of a primitive airport, only you didn't have to ..."
- "Ah, summer, what power you have to make us suffer and like it. "
- "Americans like fat books and thin women. "
- "An educated person is one who has learned that information almost always turns out to ..."
- "Anticipating that most poetry will be worse than carrying heavy luggage through O'Hare Airport, the ..."
- "Caution: These verses may be hazardous to your solemnity. "
- "Disguises thinner than a Chicago stripteaser's work clothes. "
- "Don't try to make children grow up to be like you, or they may do ..."
- "I gave up on new poetry myself 30 years ago when most of it began ..."
- "I gave up on new poetry myself thirty years ago, when most of it began ..."
- "I was converted from fool when my spine was somewhat reorganized. What amazed me was ..."
- "In America, it is sport that is the opiate of the masses. "
- "In an age when the fashion is to be in love with yourself, confessing to ..."
- "Inanimate objects can be classified scientifically into three major categories; those that don't work, those ..."
- "Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say that what we really ..."
- "Life is always walking up to us and saying, "Come on in, the living's fine," ..."
- "Live by publicity, you'll probably die by publicity. "
- "Misery no longer loves company. Nowadays it insists on it. "
- "Objects can be classified scientifically into three major categories: those that don't work, those that ..."
- "People seem to enjoy things more when they know a lot of other people have ..."
- "People who say you're just as old as you feel are all wrong, fortunately. "
- "Poetry is so vital to us until school spoils it. "
- "Reporters thrive on the world's misfortune. For this reason they often take an indecent pleasure ..."
- "Situation comedy on television has thrived for years on "canned" laughter grafted by gaglines by ..."
- "Skins tanned to the consistency of well-traveled alligator suitcases. "
- "The goal of all inanimate objects is to resist man and ultimately defeat him. "
- "The lobbies of the new hotels and the Pan American Building exhale a chill as ..."
- "The only thing I was fit for was to be a writer, and this notion ..."
- "The worst thing about being a tourist is having other tourists recognize you as a ..."
- "Usually, terrible things that are done with the excuse that progress requires them are not ..."
- "What the New Yorker calls home would seem like a couple of closets to most ..."
- "When it comes to cars, only two varieties of people are possible - cowards and ..."
- "You can't enjoy light verse with a heavy heart. "


